Spiritual Nomad :: Week Six :: Virtues and Gratitude

Tags

13/4, paganism, reflection, seasons, spiritual nomad

Here’s my update for the final week of Dianne Sylvan’s Becoming a Spiritual Nomad Course, which I found a lot of resistance to; and thus it’s taken a while to write my final update on this module. However, I’ve enjoyed taking my time looking through each aspect slowly.

 

Ethical Values
My experiences with ethical codes have led me to follow the Five Precepts of Buddhism. These are a guidelines rather than rules, but I find they allow me a good guide which doesn’t stop me form living life as I’d like to:

Abstain from killing / Be kind
Abstain from stealing / Give
Abstain from manipulation and misconduct / Be content
Abstain from lying / Be honest
Abstain from actions which lead to mindlessness / Be mindful

I’d like to be kind, to feel able to give, to be content with my life, to be honest, and to ensure that when I drink alcohol, I do not become so mindless I cannot be responsible for my actions.

Thinking about this topic, I’d like to include a few more values; inspired from the Nine Noble Truths:

honour – This is a very resonant value for me, particularly in terms of keeping your word
hospitality – although part of being kind and giving, worth saying separately
discipline
courage

I feel that fidelity and truth are covered by the precepts. Self Reliance, Industriousness and Perseverance fail to inspire me as much; so I’ve left them out.

 

Project: Offering Pouch

This is an exercise I would like to do more often. I used to have a sunglasses case with herbs and ribbon in it for sacrifice; but have fallen out of the habit.

I do have a pouch of herbs with me for my own protection / sense of safety. Which I could get into the habit of using as an offering too – but it doesn’t have a very secure closing mechanism.

I think I’ll have to loo through my materials and see if I can find something which suits the purpose.

 

Gratitude Practice

I have an up and running gratitude practice already; but I like the idea of expanding this to bring in aspects of metta meditation – bringing to mind a difficult person to be grateful for.  Will have a play around with the ideas here.

 

Contemplation Questions

1. I had a few moments of spiritual crisis when I was losing my faith in Christianity. I prayed to the Christian God for help and felt only emptiness. I tried and tried and nothing changed. I prayed to the Gods of other faiths; and began to feel a response in my own being. Change happened in my situation, (i.e. person left for own reasons) which happened at the time I began praying to the Pagan deities. It took a few months to really settle with this new experience.

2. Three negatives: person D, the cause for the above experience, not getting into the clinical course last year. Three positives: The people I turned to in 2005, finding writing, joining Anderida.

3. One rule I would not practise would be any that says this is the only way. “There is one god, one way, one path, one prophet”. I don’t agree that in this universe of wonders, of connections, contrasts and balance that there is only one of something for all beings.

4. My life is most affected by the value of honour – I have serious issues dealing with people who do not keep their word; and serious problems dealing with times when I break mine. I do not make promises. I find it hardest to be kind to people I feel have wronged me for deliberate reasons. Being kind to people who have been deliberately unkind or are dishonourable.

 

Thanks for being on this journey with me. The course had ended, but I’ll still be posting about my spiritual journey here. If you’re interested in taking part in this course, I’d recommend it. All details can be found here: http://diannesylvan.com/the-spiritual-nomad

In light,
Rose

Spiritual Nomad :: Week Five :: Self-Care

Tags

13/4, paganism, reflection, seasons, spiritual nomad

I seem to have slipped up in the fifth week of these updates but it’s better late than never, so here’s the weekly update on Dianne Sylvan’s Becoming a Spiritual Nomad Course, and it’s week FIVE!

Again, I read it a little late and then the practise got put on hold and I then read the final week’s module and just… missed week five. So I’ve done it this weekend.

I’m off to a Beltain celebration (in gale force winds and torrential rain, it seems) so I figure it’s as good a day as any to catch up.

 

My Thoughts Self-Care: Eating and Movement

Self care is an interesting topic for me. I’m a fussy eater, and up until 2011 I was officially underweight and could not put weight on.

Since being able to cook for myself, I’ve made it a goal to eat 4 portions of fruit or vegetables a day. I usually manage three without thinking, so much of a habit it has become. However, I still eat a lot of junk food. Now that I’m at a healthy weight, I’m finding it difficult to stop eating the high fat, high carbohydrate and high sugar diet.

Movement is another thing that’s been linked to my weight – feeling unable to exercise in case I lose weight further. However, dance has always been my calling. I danced from the age of 6 or 7 – just in my room, with a garden cane which I had decorated with a feather pendant and some rubber ends.

 

Balancing the Budget

I kept having some blocks towards doing this exercise, but I then realised it’s because I couldn’t possibly list everything, and thus the perfectionist in me knew it would be incomplete… so I’m making a  list instead:

Budget: £100

Outgoings:

Worry -£25

Jobs -£15

Uni -£25

Media -£10

Insomnia -£10

House stuff: -£5

Actual Income:

Cleaning my room £5

Healthy food £10

Writing £15

Positive music £10

Reading £10

Exercise £5

Extra Income Options:

Dance £10

Meditation £10

Cleaning my room £5

Yoga/Shivanata £5

Chat with friends £5

Healthy food £10

Writing £15

Positive music £10

Nature £10

Reading £10

Exercise £5

 

Movement Meditation

I used to do this by instinct when I was young, and sharing a house where my bedroom sits over the kitchen/lounge makes me feel self-conscious moving my feet (and that’s how I prefer to dance) so I move less while at university. However, I did this practise a couple of weeks ago (during the actual week 5 or 6 of the course) and it reminded me of just how helpful this practise is for me. It’s a huge energy boost; the tiredness lasts a few minutes but then dissipates.

 

Contemplation Questions

1. I try to use “we” to mean my mind and my body when talking to myself. Self-talk is something I continue to discover and lead towards positivity. I’m awarwe of it, which I guess it the first step.

2. I used to have a list of sacred self-care; from washing away negativity and clothing myself for protection (i.e. my clothes were a protective force) and cooking was a nourishing act, a gift from the gods. I’d like to bring that back into my life.

3.  The idea of a day off has real issues for me. This week I actually took off last Sunday for writing, Thursday night for gaming and yesterday (Saturday) off to write and chill out. However, most of yesterday was spent feeling guilty that I’ve take 2.5 days off!!! My mind felt that was good, but my body was restless with it. However, a day off every two weeks should be manageable to begin with. Or just an evening off. I’ll have to see.

4. I used to feel that my media exposure was really low; because I only watch specific programs I’ve downloaded (I don’t have a TV) and I don’t read news papers. However, bill boards and bus stop adverts are everywhere, people talk constantly about things the media have taught them to say and I use the internet, which has its fair share of adverts. It’s something I’m keeping an eye on, but haven’t found a full solution to meet the amount of media quiet time I’d like.

In light,
Rose

Why I Love The Business Goddess E-Course: A Review

Tags

blazing-crusade, dancing-with-limitation, money, potential, review, shivanata, SoaringStore

Psst. This is a review, thus most of the links are affiliate ones. You don’t pay more for the products, but I get appreciation monies to help support my business. If this isn’t for you, that’s totally fine.

 

A year ago, I began a journey into the world of business. I joined Leonie’s Goddess Circle (which I intend to properly review at some point as it’s amazing!) and began the Business Goddess Course.

Within a month I had a 2-hour lesson plan for a teaching venture, passive income streams that earned me over £100 for doing perhaps two hours of work across the nine months, and decided I had a real-enough business to make some business cards.

The Review

What: Become a Business Goddess eCourse

Used For: 12 months at time of writing

Price: 72$

Rating: 5/5

The Basics:

-          How to be a Business Goddess eBook

-          Money-making Kit

-          Business Goddess profiles / Business Advisors

Which Includes:

-          Leonie’s real-life experience

-          Business planning worksheets

-          A section on the Practical Side

-          Staying sane while running a business

-          Finding the balance between work-income-joy

-          How to get more people and increase sales

-          Pricing and Marketing

-          Contacting people (social networks, email lists and guest blogging)

-          Avoiding Burn-Out

 
Why Take The Course?

My mission is all about getting you to a point where you are able to support yourself. That includes on a monetary level. While trying to find this myself, I took the Business Goddess Course.

The whole course focuses on building a business doing something you love, that’s in line with your dreams. Leonie writes in such a friendly, down-to-earth way.

I chose not to print it, but to read it on my phone between lectures so that I could plan my new ideas on the bus home or in free moments around university.

 
Key Points

- I enjoyed the first lesson, which was all about Leonie’s journey and about having faith, balancing work-your dream and about having time to find your path. For me, that’s was the best beginning to an e-course I’ve ever read. A very good set of points to know before you embark on a shift like changing your business.

- There are images of her early website and each stage of her business journey; which is great to make the story real and encourage you to believe that she began in a similar place to you.

- I found it easy to relate; her idea of having a part-time job to pay the rent while spending free time creating matches my own pattern of having university assignments, a casual paid job, affiliate links on my site and then writing my novel in the free time between. The suggestions are useful and do-able.

- Unlike other business courses I’ve seen, each page has a supportive aspect to it; with comments about following your intuition, just doing what you can now and being kind to yourself.

I even took a three month stint doing financial reporting (yuck!) because I wanted to see just how far I could spread the glitter into the belly of the public service dinosaur. My findings? People everywhere are open to love and joy and having fun. They just need someone to start it.

- The information is so well-explained. I remember when I first saw the “hey, try X method” I thought “well.. yeah I had thought of that”… but having the step-by-step process outlined, the possible slip-ups warned about and some good advice for getting round obstacles was priceless.

- The guide was so easy to dip in to or read as a full book. I still dip into it when I’m creating new ideas or having a stress over money or how I’m spending my time. If nothing else, reading that someone else went gently form a full time office job to being a full-time goddess at home, and even managed to have a child and let her husband stay home to be a family – that’s worth gold when I’m struggling to see past a current block.

- It also covers both sides of the coin; there are sections for you to become an affiliate of products you love, but also information on setting up an affiliate program for you to give your supporters money in return for sales. The guide doesn’t just make you money, it guides you to running a full business.

She also expands on her suggestions by having a joint venture with a unicorn. It’s awesome and surprisingly helpful as an example.

 
My Success Story

I went into this course expecting to maybe make an e-book. I came out with an in-person 2-hour class planned for, three consistent customers, two e-books and a mailing list. From those, I’ve now begun running skype sessions of shivanata and got two possible joint ventures in the works.

I also got support for my idea of having a casual paid job on campus and keeping my studies in the fore-front. Without taking this course, I’d have still been writing that single e-book that I wasn’t very passionate about.

And a final note; I had earned a new income that covered the cost of this course within two months of beginning it, including the month I took to plan, create and start the business.

So if the money puts you off, just remember that you’re taking the course to increase your joy, your peace and your money.

 
The Links

Want to find out more? Click on through to the Business Goddess E-course page.

Also, check out the Goddess Circle I mentioned earlier, which is just $20 more but gives you access to all her meditations, courses, e-books and the forum where I first brainstormed the idea for my Shivanata sessions.

In fact, if you want to support my business by using my affiliate links, please click over to Leonie’s Shop with this handy link.

 
In Light,
Rose

Spiritual Nomad :: Week Four :: Ritual and The Wheel

Tags

13/4, paganism, reflection, seasons, spiritual nomad

Time for the weekly update on Dianne Sylvan’s Becoming a Spiritual Nomad Course, and it’s week four!

This is last Monday’s lesson (27Feb), yet I only read this last night. I’d like to say it was a really good way to get through a crowded and delayed journey home, reading the PDF on my phone and planning what I’d put in my wheel.

There was snow, engineering works and a signal failure, so my 1 hour 50 journey took 4 hours. I’ve done nothing spiritual this week, but I’m back on it today, Monday the 5^th March, listening to The Wigglian Way podcast and smelling the gentle incense.

So, let’s get back into this. I’ll be outlining how I plan to do the forth weeks work this week.

My Thoughts on Ritual
I like ritual. My first ever Pagan ritual was my dedication as a seeker of the Goddess on June 4^th 2004. I always felt a little weird speaking out loud to myself/ invisible gods, so learnt to whisper or chant the callings in my head. As I’ve attended more and more group ritual though, I’m becoming more comfortable with it.

I have my favourite ways of calling the quarters, of casting the circle, and of what items I include in my rituals. As I’ve been thinking about the mudra and prayer in the daily devotional ritual, so will be experimenting with this in the next couple of weeks.

The coursework this week was to create a ritual format. I have a good few favourite formats, so I have settled on creating a new specific ritual for each of my new wheel celebrations instead of this (but not all this week!).

Reinventing the Wheel

The idea of this project is to create a year of festivals that are important to me, as a nomad. I can pick and choose festivals from my favourite spiritualities, or from my own life.

I have a half-finished Pagan Wheel of the Year at home which I’d like to go back to before I finish this wheel; but here’s my rough design for now and the reasons for each festival.

I began with the eight festivals; I like 6 of them, and Lughnasadh and Eostre are ones I understand the importance of, so want to keep in there, even though they are the two I generally don’t do anything for.

Some of these 8 festivals have extra meanings; so I may as well list them all and explain them.

The Eight Sabbats

- (May 1) – Beltain was the first ritual I really got into a habit of celebrating, and was my first experience of ritual at university, wiccan ritual and druid ritual. Thus it’s my beginning point. Spring is actually, truly here then and I feel safe to begin growing out of the soil truly. I began the year here because this was my first shared ritual, it was the first time I did the “boast, toast and promise” which is kind of a new year thing, and it’s truly spring.

- (June 21) – Litha is a favourite of mine.

- (August 1) – I often miss this but I really want to be grateful for the food and drink I can access.

- (September 21) – Modron (most call it Mabon but Modron has such a sound to it…) is a favourite. Like Beltain, it’s the one I celebrate each year with a smile and a sudden.. connection to spirit.

- (October 31) – Samhain, Halloween. The anniversary of my grandmother’s death, and of someone close to my family’s suicide. Really important date to reflect and connect with my inner self, my inner pain and inner peace. Made even more powerful by actual events.

- (November 1) – Pagan New Year. Always loved celebrating this. Now it’s also my Druid self-initiation date.

- (December 21) – Yule. A nice quiet space. My partner and I mark this by opening each others presents. All others are Christmas presents so they wait until the family day on 25^th. But he and I give each other Yule gifts, thus open them at Yule. I also tend to celebrate this one at my altar each year.

- (February 1) – Imbolc. A favourite for its symbols. I can always see beauty in the earth on February 1^st.

- (March 21) – Eostre. I always forget/have blocks around celebrating this one. I don’t partake in lent any more (though I do have pancakes on pancake day). For me, I guess I celebrate spring in Imbolc and Beltain, so why again? Especially as we actually get snow in March in England these days.

Personal Festivals

Then I have “my” festivals – Earth day (22^nd April), my birthday (25^th August), my anniversary with my other half (26 January), the days I first connected with my three best-friends (29 March, 30 July, 1 September).

The unexpected few (the ones I ended up putting on but haven’t always celebrated/didn’t think would be important):

-          May 9^th – my first ever ritual as “high priestess” in a ritual. (it was me and a friend, thus we automatically became the joint leaders). My first ever experience of a tawny owl, and my first big insight into the forest at night-time.

-          13-17 July – Buddhafield Festival 2011 was a really important experience for me. From the new systems to the actual experiences, I had a thorough learning incident over those few days. However, I didn’t think I would include this as a new festival… There was a lot of pain associated with the waking early, the flu, being given the wrong medicine, EIGHT HOURS on delayed trains with this flu, an argument with my tent-mate which led us to sever all ties.

• However, the ritual, the open-air showers, the act of pushing myself to be on the till, the support and being able to say “thank you for letting me stay on tills. I know I was panicky at first, but you let me find my feet. Thank you for that kindness.”   It was important and I want to remember it as such.

-          I noticed on someone else’s wheel the festival of “Sakura Matsuri”, of Cherry Blossoms, which this year is 28-29 April. This is a symbol I’ve had since Spring of 2006 and I always wanted to mark it with a tattoo… having looked up this festival though, I may sneak it in as a replacement or combination with Eostre/Beltain.

-          I used to spend the spring months soaking up knowledge of books as I sought to learn about everything before it had all bloomed… I’d like to get back into this routine. I’ve read 8 books in 2 months, and this reflects my old pattern. I’ve been thinking about making some kind of “Spring Submerging in Study” for a couple of weekends throughout February-April.

So, this is my wheel so far. It’s in progress. I know that I’ve experienced depressive states throughout January since I was 11 or 12, so I’d quite like to come up with some form of celebration or ritual to cultivate joy in that space where I already release a lot of negativity. In relation to this, I’ve also noticed that from November to April, I basically have SPACE in spades… Which, considering my favourite festivals are Modron, Yule and Imbolc, this really interests me. I may have to make a few more for those times.

Contemplation Questions

1. I don’t remember many of the rituals in my life; I’ve attended two weddings in my memory; though neither really sparked anything in me. I went to a catholic school, which had an attached chapel where Mass happened every couple of weeks. The chapel was an amazing space, but the rituals were empty to me.

From Beltain 2009, I began to sense ritual as a connective energy. Beginning on May 3^rd, with the Druid group I still attend. I held hands with strangers who told the circle about their failings, their fears and their dreams. I connected in that “forest of women”. Hard to incorporate into my own ritual as holding my own hand doesn’t have the same effect.

2. Rites of Passage are things that are hard for me to put my finger on. There are “traditional” events that some cultures celebrate, but I think the things that meant a lot to me I did celebrate, in my own way. I might have to think about this one some more.

3. A date from my re-invented wheel that I would like to plan is June 4^th; my dedication. This year will be the beginning of my ninth year as a dedicant? of the Gods. I would like to have a reflection and celebration ritual for this day. Usually I let myself buy a pagan-related book or object for my altar. I think I’d like to make something I can add to/make something new for each year… maybe a tapestry or a scene/picture I can add to. I’d like to use my traditional cast and call quarter routine, not the Druid grove I’m using more often now.

4. I’ve not been doing the daily meditation, so will skip this question for now.

In light,
Rose

Connecting to Practise – iv – A Seeker And The Shadows

Tags

13/4, blazing-crusade, breaking habits&labels, connect, enchantress, LiteratureLessons, metaphor, potential

As part of my connection theme for this year, I’ve been turning to written material. I’m on the eighth Gwers of my Druid studies, over half-way through Spirits of the Sacred Grove [Emma Restall Orr] and I’m taking Dianne Sylvan’s Spiritual Nomad course.

A couple of weeks ago, I found a new blog and picked up an e-book called Walk Like a God by Drew Jacob.

I had a few revelations, so this is a long post, and may stretch two. They’re a little bit jumpy, but there is a thread (my trail of thoughts) flowing through each section, so I hope it makes some sense. I’ve also had a lot of blocks to posting this openly, but I feel it’s an important journey dialogue.

 

Connecting the Connections

If you’ve been following my blog for the last two years, you’ll know I have this mild obsession with labels, and have spent a lot of time searching for that “perfect term” for myself; still defining the goal of my life. That dream I’ve always wanted to attain but never even felt I got onto the path of.

On this journey, I have found comfort in the term of enchantress, found joy in the label of priestess, and I’ve valued dance, martial arts, strength-building and writing as the highest values of my life. I can take a label from each of these, yet it’s never covered every part of me.

This week, I’ve been focused on my lack of motivation to wake early and get back into writing (I’m on novel #5 now). Throughout my various reading of the past few weeks, I saw the connection.

 

Having talked about the success of forming habits being based on motivation, I know that personally, the defining of the end goal is a big block for me in forming a new habit. The more I try, the more I began to ask myself why I’m not living life as I want to. Why can’t I wake early and meditate?

Is it all an issue of definition?

 

Enticement

As I shuffle through the memories of this “seeking self”; the search for strength and for quietude have been the greatest and longest lasting. I’ve craved focus as much as I’ve enjoyed being distracted.

In each story, I find that thread of desire for stillness. I find the scholar who wants to understand what others understood, the psychologist who wants to understand people’s volition, the star-gazer who wants to absorb the knowledge of the universe and the reader who wants to feel every emotion of every character invented. Yet within this dream is that underlying sense of quiet spirit. And below that, power.

I sense a deep thrum of power, and I seek it. I am enticed to follow the silent calling.

 

If I understand why people act as they do, why that works as it does; why atoms form like that – I have knowledge of how everything moves. I’ll be able to understand and maybe to change how those worlds work. Underlying the scholar is the strength-seeking woman who wants to connect with the world. In my mind, I see a stealthy being, cloaked in silence and able to experience things most people miss.

I notice in the shadows of stillness, that’s what I seek. This is the Connection to Practise I spoke of.

 

A Specific Term Speaks

Last week, I found myself flickering through the various minimal and spiritual posts I’ve found over the past couple of years, and through various links, ended up at Drew Jacob’s blog: Rogue Priest.

I hadn’t read a single blog post before I felt the ripple. The terminology alone hit home for me and the thrum got louder as associations flew into my conscious awareness.

 

Rogue… off the trodden path, a skilled thief in the ragnarok online game. A shadowy figure who uses stealth and skills. Sometimes wild and untamed yet all about the quietude… Focused and still… unseen yet powerful. Connecting to the land but often without obvious knowledge of it.

 

Priest… quiet, connected to spirit, focused and calm. “Witchy powers” came to mind, as I began my spiritual path self-defining as a witch. Also shadowy due to the silence, the reverence. All these associations flew forward: those and less relevant ones like my connection between martial arts and monasteries… the discipline and quiet appeal.

 

This is exactly what I’ve sought.  This is a label I could happily follow. Reverence, priesthood, stealth, quiet…

I want the structure and focus yet simplicity of priesthood. I want the freedom, passion and skill of a rogue.  I want that thrum, that power, that passion. This is the form of practise I want to connect with.

 

 

Head high, cloak draped over my shoulder, I step out of the sunlight and into the shadows: a seeker of stillness.

Spiritual Nomad :: Week Three :: Prayer and The Journey Book

Tags

13/4, paganism, reflection, seasons, spiritual nomad

Time for the weekly update on Dianne Sylvan’s Becoming a Spiritual Nomad Course, and it’s week three! If you missed last week’s update, click here.

I’ve left my altar with it’s four components: incense, oil burner, dragon and butterfly. This week I read the module on prayer and we were assigned to begin a journey book.

My Thoughts on Prayer
I like prayer. I remember sitting in assemblies at school fitting as many Goddess Chants into the “Our Father” as would fit nicely. The rhythms matched, so this became my ritual; twice a week I’d sit and chant, focusing on the same intentions as the rest of the room; the recent hurricane inAmerica or an earthquake in some place I’d not heard of. I focused on the fact that humans were hurting, and that I’d been taught prayer would help them.

I didn’t realise before reading this module that I used mudras. I’d also never thought of half of the suggestions to be forms of prayer before. Knowing that half of things I do are already forms of prayer made me feel good about myself. I am doing things that connect me with the divine force. I’m a “good pagan” as my mind termed it.

The Journey Book
I’ve had three main books throughout my spiritual journey. I made a cardboard book with scraps of paper cut and held in place by selotape and elastic bands when I was 13. (Will have to find it and take a picture when I go home in 3 weeks).

I then had this purple A5 soft-cover book to write associations, rune meanings, dreams and poetry in; which still has the three feathers I used in my first “spell”. Then I got a plain black and red A5 book which I put butterfly stickers on (see my altar picture for images of these). This book became a more formal associations list; with my own personal morning and evening devotions, my quarter calls and a list of each date I fasted for “spiritual reasons”. This was partly linked to my ED, but I didn’t know I had one back then.

I keep my ritual notes ona  compute document, mainly because I can attach photographs and links to people’s websites to say “did X ritual (see link) with Y form (ys blog link). “Did animal oracle, got this card, means (link to webpage) and so on.

Then, I have my druid studies book. It’s a lovely Edgar Allen Poe (check outEureka: a prose poem <3) book which has a pocket at the back for feathers, leaves and even the business cards of fellow druids. This is more of a journal as I follow the OBOD Bardic Grade course; but I intend to write out all the group druid ceremonies I’ve experienced at the back of the book (from the notes I made on my word document).

Finally, I have this set of blog posts, which are currently the only journaling I’ve done for the course, minus the odd private note on the course facebook page.

Having said that, I also have a tiny book of positive quotes I wrote from various sources. I used to take everywhere with me. Might have to get back into that.

The final action for this week was to under-take some reading in our prayer space. I’ve not done this, but it is a part of my Druid studies framework to sit with the words of the Eisteddfod.

 

Contemplation Questions

1. As a child, I only learnt the Lord’s Prayer and the Hail Mary’s. I remember most of it. More-so, I remember reading in a book called Inner Magic that witches were believed to not be able to say the Lord’s Prayer without choking.

I like that it’s gratiudinal? Er.. about gratefulness I don’t like the lack of true meaning, and the differing words to something that’s meant to be the same for everyone.

I prefer to make my prayers up; form my heart.  When reciting a prayer someone else has written, with other people, I want them all the recite the same thing. It’s “forgive us our trespasses”, not “sins”. Grr.

2. I have a few of Dianne Sylvan’s book quotes in my aforementioned books; but they’re not obviously spiritual. The ones from The Body Sacred about dealing with stress by talking about Hello Kitty pants and swallowing bananas whole helped me find humour in trauma; so I guess that counts as spiritual?

3. I’m away from most of these books as I’m at University right now, but I plan to go through them when I return home.

4. See above. I’ll do this one once I’m home with my books.

In light,
Rose

Spiritual Nomad :: Week Two :: Seeking Inspiration

Tags

13/4, paganism, reflection, seasons, spiritual nomad

Time for the weekly update on Dianne Sylvan’s Becoming a Spiritual Nomad Course, and it’s week two of six! If you missed last week’s update, click here.

Last week I stripped my altar and began a new breath practise. This week it’s an inspiration board and an altar ritual.

Guru Board

I like the idea of a guru board. Of images and words which inspire me. Yet, as I sat down to do it, I felt a block. Right now, it doesn’t feel right.

However, back in 2010 I made an “influence map” and most of the items mentioned are sacred to me, or inspire me, so I’m just going to re-share it here:

Click the image or click here to find out what each section means to me.

The Altar Ritual

We were to choose three items to go back on the altar. I chose the butterfly, my incense and my dragon. Today though, I also brought my oil burner out, so maybe I can count “oil and incense burners” as one item.

I haven’t done the breathing devotional ritual as our assignment suggested, but I have been doing the three breath exercise from Druidry, and reciting the Druids prayer with a candle lit, which I’m counting as a ritual. I’d like to elongate it to the ten minutes as suggested, so maybe I’ll add that to next week’s homework.

Contemplation Questions

1. Missing due to personal answer ^_^

2. I generally meditate in different spaces and my altar is kind of ever-changing in itself; so to put different objects on didn’t feel that different to me. I did miss my oil burner, so brought that back in, and I put up a new quotation above it where before I’d just had space. I prefer having words to focus on rather than objects.

3. 30 Words or Less: “I’m a Druid Pagan with Norse, Buddhist and Native American influences. Specifically I’m a Bard-in-training.” I’d never put the term Wiccan in, but based on my more “witchy” practises I guess I get a lot of the practical words/actions from Wicca too.  I’d love to be the Church of the Black Forest Gateaux though… Maybe I should work on that =P

4. Art and illogical words are a major “non-inspiration” for me, which a lot of people seem to get inspiration from. I’d much rather look at a blade of grass than the Mona Lisa (although don’t get me wrong, I do love some art), and there are so many phrases from the philosophers, scientists, religious speakers… that just.. they don’t make sense! And yet people quote them and base spiritual practises on them. That’s great if it works for you. But don’t expect me to feel the same way about them because all my mind is saying is “Well, that’s bollocks, and you need another noun in that fragment to make it a real sentence”. It’s got to be logical; even if it’s a fantasy comment, it needs to meet that parameters of belief in which it is set.  Oops. /rant. 
In love and light,
Rose

Spiritual Nomad :: Week One :: Leopard God Memories

Tags

13/4, decluttering, paganism, reflection, seasons, spiritual nomad

A couple of weeks ago I signed up to Dianne Sylvan’s Becoming a Spiritual Nomad Course, partially because I’ve loved all her books, and partly because this year I made a goal to connect with practise. It began this week, and I’ve completed the first week’s assignments (as I like to think of them).

Essentially, it’s a six-week E-course in eclectic spirituality, and this week was focused on Moments of Grace, our Altar, and a Breathing meditation.

I’ve also been writing up quotes to go on my walls and added five books to my Amazon Wish List.

 

Moments of Grace
When I first read about these, I could think of two. One happened while I was sitting in the library with my partner; back when we’d been together about two months.

The other was my first experience of Druid ceremony; Beltain 2009 where I became one tree in a “forest of women” while the men meditated in a separate circle. The whole day filled with a vibration I still remember: from hearing 80 women cry and laugh, to hold their hands, to stand under/in/on a sacred space on the coast: with the earth, sea and sky surrounding us.

As I began the next activity, drawing a path of a faith (I interpreted this as a timeline expressing our moments of grace, important events and our state of faith), I found others.

I have the Solstice which set my mind on beginning the Bardic OBOD course. I had a wonderful experience at my self-initiations – both of “to the goddess” in 2004 and to my bardic journey last November. I remember my first experiences of meditation. Of my first love. And the many moments of growth and challenge I overcame with a sense of faith in my current relationship.

I remember studying Hinduism in junior school, and drawing a tortoise goddess “Kuma” on my book cover. I’ve since tried to find her and the closest I find is Kurmu, an avatar of Vishnu; or Kumar, a God of War.

From this same time period, I remember having to write down in my RE book if I believed in God. I was about seven, and I wrote somethign like “not God but there’s somethign out there” and I drew a picture of the world, and a chair outside the world.

Inside the chair, I drew a leopard.

 

Yeah. your guess is as good as mine. My teacher marked it with something like “oh good” if I remember correctly.   I’d like to point out that (as far as I remember) I didn’t think there was a leopard god; I just wanted to express it wasn’t a man, but it had substance and I’d recognise it

Either way, I remember that sense of knowing. Something’s out there. It is.

 

The Altar

My altar here at University is a small area; usually a corner of my drawers; fit around the hair bands, earring box, make-up and cards/photographs/ornaments.  When I read this section, I glanced over at it and sighed. I didn’t want to clear it. I decided I’d skip that as it’s not my permanent space.

Yet somehow, throughout the week, I did it.

We were told to clear it, but in my case that means moving the incense and putting my books away… that is my altar while i’m here: space.

 

Contemplation Questions

1. Spiritual exploration has generally been a positive experience, in that I’ve turned to it and sought it mainly when my life was negative; so in comparison to without it; spirit is comforting and freeing. Joyful.

2. Most negative experiences were my unfounded fear, disgreements with others/institutions and the lack of connection. I learnt that I need connection; that I came into Paganism looking for family when I had no other. And that my spirituality is mine. That’s an important lesson I took a while to learn.

3. As a scientist who sometimes views the divine/god/spirit as a a bunch of conscious energy, but also prays to human-like figures and also uses the individual pantheon names – the question about “what would you generally call it/them?” is a difficult one to answer.

Lately, I’ve been referring to them as “the gods” (with a little g because I realised yesterday that I find it “prettier than a capital G” o.O ) or “Spirit”. Calling spirit by names is something I understnad to shift with it’s purpose. If I need a hug, she appears as a motherly or best-friendly, but if I’m angry and am asking for conversation, I’ll see the warrior (male or female). In formal ritual, I refer to them as “God and Goddess”.  So i guess it depends, but “the gods” suits me most of the time.

4. I generally experience them as a force of thrumming energy. It’s a knowing inside, a strength in the air which I’m breathing in, or just a feeling of security. This is what I sought at 13, so this is how I associate the feeling of the gods. For the first 13 years, I experienced a fearful power and I blocked it. It was an emptiness that told me something was there. In times when I’ve used discrete names, I’ve felt a difference in the warmth, the size of the energy (which sounds really weird but it feels more tightly packed than spacious).

5. My minimum “needs” of an altar is “me”. I’ve very happy sitting on my bed and utilising my imagination, or just the air in my lungs and the water in my body. However, my ideal would have the four elements, an image for me to focus on, and some ylang ylang incense. With a lot of space between each item. Space is Sacred.

In love and light,
Rose

30DOD – 17 – Inspirations: Storytelling and Myth

Tags

30daysofdruidry, druidry, LiteratureLessons, reflection

 This is the seventeenth post in the 30 days to Druidry series.

 

Myth and Stories were again, something I’d not experienced in that special way until I found Paganism. I’d been read books before; but here I found people who knew stories by heart, and gave each character a new voice. Each version changed slightly but the symbolism, the poetry, the song…. It was the same. The stories had truths within their fabrications.

As mentioned in V for Vendetta, artists use lies to tell the truth. In these stories of fantasy and seemingly impossible rubbish, were the lessons and the essences of true thoughts, feelings or actions.

I’ve never fancied myself a story-teller; despite being a novelist, poet and blogger; because reading my work and giving each character a voice is beyond my current abilities. Perhaps it’s something I’ll explore but for now, I feel content to write; to keep those truths and lies within the written word. Yet in my own way, I am a story-teller, aiming to get these written words published for others to read. Stories for people to tell.

 

I remember being 7 or 8 and being told that stories were stories. Made up. Rubbish. That crying over characters in a book was silly.

And then I remember being 13 or 14, and reading a very short story two wolves.

The Two Wolves

A Native American grandfather was talking to his grandson about how feelings. “There are two wolves fighting in your heart. One wolf is vengeful, angry, violent. The other wolf is loving, compassionate and kind.” The grandson thought about this for a moment, before asking, “Which wolf will win?”

 The grandfather answered: “The one you feed.”

For some reason, that was my realisation that stories could contain truths.

 

Myth

Mythology played an even bigger part of my journey. The myths of Greek Gods and the Norse Beliefs were the two experiences which brought me to Native American creation stories. Each tribe had different stories, yet there was a familiarity within the words.

And Myths about the Gods are the doorway to their party. Through each set of stories, I found myself understanding these characters and their actions. I felt for Artemis and Apollo; understood Freyja’s choices and could feel Scathach’s war cry in my heart.

 

If stories gave me truth and taught me about belief systems; myths gave me feeling, emotion and taught me about people’s differences and how feelings can be driven by those beliefs.

In light,
Rose

30DOD – 16 – Inspirations: Prayer and Meditation

Tags

30daysofdruidry, druidry, obod, paganism

 This is the sixteenth post in the 30 days to Druidry series.

I began meditating in the Summer of 2004. I found Paganism in May/June I remember spending the summer holiday nights cross-legged on my bed, either feeling the buzz of my skin, seeing colours in front of me, or feeling for the ground with an invisible root

I discovered this energy I’d never been told about, and found myself able to cope with the suffering of my daily life. I could come home and close my eyes and see the forest with its lake, and a wolf stood beside it. I could hike that imaginary forest and find the cubs. I could visualise the colours of my aura and change them at will.

My imagination had needed a release before I learnt to paint and write; and meditation was my space.

Prayer was a more painful space for me to be within. During a tough space in my life, I prayed to the Christian God, and got no response. Once I found Paganism, I found that my prayers were answered, but in a different way. After some answers, I began to use prayers to give thanks. I began to sit on the floor of my room and have conversations with the Gods.

These days I don’t really pray much, but I have this awareness of a presence. I meditate and I have a space of quiet a couple of times a week should I need to hear something. I also give thanks on a weekly basis, which is more let out to the earth and air; but if a deity wishes to hear them, that’s fine too.

In my opinion, meditation is my space and prayer is the God’s space.

In light,
Rose